I haven’t made a Christmas wish list since I was a kid. I liked the idea of putting one together this year because Squeezable Companion and I are SO busy and this will makes Christmas shopping a breeze for SC when he has that one weekend off every three weeks to go shopping. Fa la la la la yeah right.
I remember now why I haven’t made one of these for anyone in over two decades: the lists I wished up were absurdly extravagant. And I guess that’s what I like about them, that they are just wishes. I can’t get too lavish or wasteful or bizarre when it’s just me sitting there wishing for things.
So here’s my first adult wish list. On a side note, all SC wants is a blue-ray disk of Star Trek. He’s super excited.
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1. Breaking Bad, the complete DVD collection. $379.99. Because it’s the best TV show ever created. Yes, better than Lost, better than Battlestar Galactica, better than X-Files. Plus the packaging is awesome and wearing the Los Pollos Hermanos apron to cook meth would make me seriously bad ass.
2. Classic Fraser Fir Christmas Tree with Real-Feel ™ Technology, 7.5′. $759. Because having a baby makes me appreciate the ease and fireproof quality of a well made pre-lit Christmas tree that doesn’t require water, doesn’t shed, and won’t spontaneously catch fire because of a few warm light bulbs.
3. Clarinet. $2108. Because Woody Allen plays it. SC says that’s a great reason to do anything, like marrying your adopted daughter, say. Or writing and directing Manhattan, I say. Okay, well, I used to play it in high school, I was good at it, and I want to play Pink Martini’s “Hold On Little Tomato” for Baby.
4. Annual memberships to Boston Children’s Museum, $150, New England Aquarium, $95, and Museum of Fine Arts, $110. Because they’re great ways to plan the week for Baby and mom during the winter months when indoor activities become crucial to preventing cabin fever. And Baby loves those penguins.
5. Overnight baby sitting for a night out on the town, which includes a meal at Neptune, cocktails at Top of the Hub, a night’s stay at a five star hotel, and brunch at Martin’s in Brookline Village. Approx. $750. Because a night away from Baby does wonders for rejuvenating our sex life and makes for happier parents and (thus) Baby.
6. 27″ iMac desktop computer. $1999. Because it looks fantastic and I want to make better home movies.
7. iPhone 5S. $399. Because I love my iPhone 4S and I want the next gen iPhone for even better photos and videos of Baby and a larger screen to enjoy both.
8. Swarovski owls, turtle doves, kingfishers, bee eaters, hoopoes, puffins figurines. Approx. $210/piece. Because they’re beautiful and I want to add to my current collection of crystal birds. That’s right, I have a collection of crystal birds. And no it’s not like collecting souvenir spoons or shot glasses. Not even close.
9. Porter Pass for 100 one way flights. Because I want to visit my family in Toronto more often, no, as often I want, multiple times a week if I feel like it. Okay, maybe 100 flights is a bit much for 365 days. Let’s go with the 20 flights package. But I want the flexible bundle so that I can book a trip an hour before if I feel like it. Yeah, just pack up the baby and get to the airport within an hour…in my Tesla!
10. Tesla Model S. $72,400. Because it looks fantastic and Elon Musk is a ROCKSTAR. But in black.
11. Family trip to a Greek Island for a week with BF’s family. $3500. Because SC’s never been to Europe, because the Greek islands are gorgeous, and the food is delicious; because it’ll be way cheaper (who cares says my wishing self to my practical self; my ps says my bad) and easier to travel to Europe before the second baby comes.
Look at that beach. The colors are that spectacular. Louis de Bernières describes the quality of the light in Kefalonia like this in his Captain Corelli’s Mandolin: “as though straight from the imagination of God in His youngest days, when He still believed that all was good.” Unadulterated, unfiltered, virgin. It’s like you learn to see for the first time all over again.
And besides–as summed up by one of the few French phrases that not even my linguistically lackadaisical mind can’t seem to lose track of–pourquoi pas?
12. Snow on Christmas Day. $N/A. Because it feels more like Christmas with snow. This one is really just wishful thinking since there’s no way SC can afford to make snow. This one would break the bank, I think.